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Broken Links
By Komal Makhdoom.
Futurist Essay.
11.09.08
It is the year 2033, and the Gregorian calendar has not been replaced. The microphone on my NotePod is transcribing my sentences, while its built-in eye-tool will capture selective images that can be reproduced in hologram form if the audience chooses to see me speak. There is a voice activation feature on the NotePod’s drop-down menu, which will play my voice at a custom volume scale. The extensive dictionary of the speech-recognition component will prevent any of my words from going unrecognized.
Every NotePod has a complimentary Glo-chip installed in it. It’s back label reads:
“All recorded content will be reported to the Globinal’s international staff, that will decode dialects, variations, slang, and related components of the language used, ensuring that no word or phrase goes unrecognized, and that your accent is comprehensible.”
I wonder how soon the “complimentary” chips will become mandatory in all voice-activated devices (VADs). Not that I mind them as an extra feature. I think it’s great that they’re free now. Just not so much that they’re non-removable.
In a way, the chips are the public’s own invention. They were suggested in last election’s Digi-poll, the mandatory electronic survey filled out by voters to implement a new technical division in public universities, and a government-sponsored employment track related to it. Globinal translators initially offered live support for VADs with multi-lingual components. Today, their “complementary” chip accompanies almost every electronic device with a speech function. Because VADs are more accessible, their export value is increasing globally. The local industry is increasing rapidly based on demand as well. Long live Digi-polls, I guess.
Gone are the days when I’d push the ‘escape’ button on my Macintosh and ask it to tell me a joke. For some reason, however, I’ve yet to escape the primitive technology of instruction manuals. In the next Digi-poll, I may be voting for all electronic devices to know their own function. Either that, or they should be synchronous with our mentalichips. Mentalichips have all the answers. The NotePod would know exactly what I’d want transcribed, and the method in which I’d want it published, if it could only hear the little strip of metal I spent millions to install near my temple. But today, I have to listen to the droning computer recite the following instructions and precautions:
“To adjust the language and volume of your readable audio, or the visual quality of your hologram, please install the micro-pad accompanying the NotePod into your index finger. The micro-pad will align itself to the print-rings on your digit. Upon reaching optimum temperature, the film on the pad should display a faint white glow. Align the installed pad to an un-covered finger of your choice, by rubbing the two together. This combination finger will be used to direct the NotePod’s menu through the micro-pad. If the glowing micro-pad does not respond to the initial finger of choice, please try another one.
If your pad does not glow after 30 seconds of installation, choose from the following voice commands to allow it to solve your problem:
'Get New Pad:' After screening the voice and credit card associated with your fingerprint, the repair terminal connected to your micro-pad will order and ship a new device to the address associated with the initial micro-pad purchase, from the nearest located Micro-Center. Any defective pad is eligible for return within 24-hours of purchase.
'Help Without Purchase:' The Micro-Center representative matching your e-profile, based on former purchases made with the credit card on your record, will contact you within 30 seconds of your call. After insta-comparing records of your daily holo-phone minute usage obtained from your provider, to the average number of keystrokes uploaded to your global-file by your wireless keyboard, the representative will select whether to communicate via IM or your personal holo-phone.
The Micro-Pad Allows You to Customize Your Reading Experience.
If you feel discomforted by any component of the essay, please adjust it to your preference. If you are in audio mode, scroll the RPM option to increase or decrease vocal speed. If you have trouble understanding the writer’s expression, or would like a visual presentation for any other reason, choose the character you find most suitable for the hologram feature…”
The NotePod is online-capable. Everything is online-capable. And as long as things are online-capable, the Globinal has access to them. The accessibility feature on the NotePod allows articles to connect to the Globinal, where they are translated and then archived. My essay can be read, heard, and/or viewed in over 6912 languages in any country with a Wifi terminal.
A couple of decades ago, all we had was Google. When I have the time to develop memories, they can be bothersome. I wonder if I’m ashamed to have belonged to an era when only 80 languages were recognized on the web, incorporating only 30 countries. Sometimes I wonder what the pressures on common people were two decades ago, if not for mandatory enrollment in classes explaining the importance of inventions established after Digi-polls. I can hardly remember if any old body was allowed to use the Internet back then, or if there was always a permit-process like today.
Now I’m wondering how users ever felt safe on the Internet if any old body was allowed to use it. Why is my memory failing me? The mentalichip must be malfunctioning. It usually has all the answers.
Maybe I’m just tired from listening to instruction manuals. I should check the warranty on my chip to see if it covers boredom from unnecessary primitiveness. I know it doesn’t cover pressure from certain mindwaves. If I’ve broken my mentalichip thinking too hard about the Globinals, it’s too late for a refund. But I guess worrying about a refund would add to the damage too. I should stop. I should set aside any discomforting thoughts, to avoid losing the couple more millions I have in my savings. It’s ok. I am safe. My version of the mentalichip is too outdated to have the Globinal component obligatorily installed. They won’t be able to scan and archive my thoughts in 6912 different languages and publish them to any willing buyer at any end of the world. The two of us are safe.
Works Cited
American Management Association, 2005. "2005 Electronic Monitoring and Surveillance Survey: Many Companies Monitoring, Recording, Videotaping—and Firing—Employees." Available: http://www.amanet.org/press/amanews/ems05.htm
Apple Inc., 2008. "Physical and Motor Skills." Available: http://www.apple.com/accessibility/macosx/physical.html.
"INotes Lite." Available: http://www.apple.com/webapps/utilities/noteslite.html.
D'Amico, Mary Lisbeth,1999. "Voice-activated devices on the way." Available: http://www.cnn.com/TECH/computing/9908/13/voiceactivate.idg.
Google Inc., 2008. available: www.google.com.
National Virtual Translation Center, 2008. "Languages of the World." Available: http://www.nvtc.gov/lotw/months/november/worldlanguages.htm.
Patent Storm, 2000. "Current-sensing Touch Pad Patent." Available: http://www.patentstorm.us/patents/6054979/description.html.
Robotics and Automation, 2002. Proceedings. ICRA '02. IEEE International Conference. Available: http://ieeexplore.ieee.org/xpl/freeabs_all.jsp?arnumber=1014779.
Wilson, Mark, 2008. "Dreamoc 3D Display Turns Any Phone into Hologram Machine." Available: http://www.gizmodo.com.au/2008/10/dreamoc_3d_display_turns_any_phone_into_hologram_machine-2.html.
Youtube, 2007. "3D Hologram Phone." Available: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Y1A-ft2EIiE.
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